Category Archives: lame excuses in sport

Hosted and ghosted, haunted and daunted: Knicks season on the sofa week 12 review

When a four-game week starts with a resounding defeat that is subsequently blamed on staying in a haunted hotel, you fear for the remaining three match-ups. And so it proved.

After a resounding 18-point shellacking at the hands of the bustling and vibrant Oklahoma City Thunder, the Knicks pulled out a rare road win in Philly before rediscovering some of the bad habits that defined their early season in losses to Toronto and Detroit.

With the recent optimism surrounding the Knicks beginning to resonate around the league, their non-performance in Oklahoma was as surprising as it was disappointing. The writing was on the wall from the first of the game when, with Knicks defenders sleepwalking and failing to box out, guard Russell Westbrook unleashed a ferocious put-back dunk. With the home crowd engaged right from the start, the Thunder were – in no particular order – quicker, more atheltic, more committed on defence, more aggressive and more willing than their stagnant opponents.

Led by superstar-in-waiting Kevin Durant’s 30 points, the Thunder opened an early 10-point lead that swelled to 16 at the half and 22 after three. The man JE Skeets calls Durantula was equally effective on the defensive end, using his length to upset the Knicks shooters. His block of a Gallinari corner three will live long in the memory.

The Knicks never looked like getting back into it. Shut down by stifling defence, Mike D’Antoni’s men could only post 38.2% shooting, a figure that was bolstered by an 11 for 16 stretch in fourth quarter garbage time. Danilo Gallinari and Chris Duhon couldn’t muster a field goal between them. Post game, D’Antoni described the performance as “one to flush down the toilet”. It was the most appropriate place for such a performance.

Showing the degree of self-awareness that professional sportsmen are renowned for, the Knicks didn’t blame themselves for the loss. Instead, the offered one of the lamest excuses in sporting history by claiming the Oklahoma hotel in which they stayed was haunted. With their sleep patterns irrevocably disturbed, they clearly had no choice but to play like zombies against the team christened the “Zombie Sonics” by Bill Simmons.

Two nights later, the Knicks rolled into Philadelphia although, judging by the rows and rows of empty seats, they could have been forgiven for thinking they had taken a detour to Charlotte, Memphis or New Jersey. Thanks to a box score stuffing performance from Jared Jeffries and a towering 24-point effort from David Lee, who played despite the death of his 92-year-old grandfather, the Knicks ended a five-year, nine-game losing streak in the Wachovia Center. Lee, inching closer to an all-star roster spot, made each of his first eight shots and, with things getting tight down the stretch, went four for four when it really mattered. Lee’s final bucket, a lay-up with 13 seconds left, put the Knicks ahead for good 93-92.

While his effort and ability to perform the intangibles has been consistently good over for at least 30 games, it is rare Jared Jeffries’ hard work is reflected in the box score. This game was the exception as Jeffries let rip with a (relative to him) nine point scoring explosion in the first quarter. He ended up with 15, along with nine boards, three assists, two steals and a block. Gallinari, Wilson Chandler and Al Harrington backed him up with double figure scoring.

Having put the Philly hoo-doo behind them, the Knicks returned to MSG for another divisional match-up against Toronto. The game offered the Knicks a chance to edge even closer into the race for the lower play-off seedings. It was also an all-Italian showdown pitting Gallo against former No 1 pick Andrea Bargnani. Sadly for Gallinari, he was utterly outshone by his campatriot who, despite having a girl’s name, shot the Garden lights out.

Bargnani’s sharpshooting exemplified his team’s efforts in the first quarter. The Raptors shot 63% and poured in 39 points in the opening 12 minutes. By half time, the lead was 24 and the game was over as a contest. Despite a spirited second half fightback led by Harrington’s 31 points off the bench, the Knicks briefly cut the lead to eight only for the Raptors to pull away again. The result gave the Raptors a 3.5 game cushion over the Knicks.

The loss to the Raptors was compunded 24 hours later when the Knicks dropped their final game of the week in Detroit. Whether the problem was fatigue or simply disinterest, the majority of the Knicks simply couldn’t match the energy the Pistons showed through Rodney Stuckey, Chris Wilcox and Jason Maxiell. David Lee kept them in the game early with 16 first quarter point but when he was subsequently shut down by Ben Wallace and Maxiell in the second, Detroit built a formidable lead.

Trailing by 17 after three quarters, the Knicks finally woke up in the game’s final minutes. D’Antoni inserted Nate Robinson and Jordan Hill into the game and finally got the spark his starters had failed to provide. Nate exploded with 11 points in the quarter while rookie Hill showed off post moves and a nice fadeaway as they ate into the lead. Hill’s effort may well be rewarded with more minutes in future games.

Ultimately, it was too little, too late. The Pistons wobbled under the pressure of the Knicks’ late run but Stuckey righted the ship with some timely drives to the hoop. The Knicks cut the lead to just two points in the dying seconds but Detroit iced the game with free throws.

Fortunately, the Knicks have the chance to make up for this loss almost immediately on Martin Luther King Day as they host the Pistons at the  Garden. Having  lost three of their last four, the game takes on must-win significance for the Knicks to not only regain their early 2010 momentum but to ensure they stay in touch in the race for that final Eastern Conference playoff place.

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Filed under Basketball, lame excuses in sport, nba, New York Knicks, Season on the sofa

The lamest excuses in sport

After turning in one of their worst performances of the season, the New York Knicks offered up a bizarre excuse for their 106-88 loss to the blossoming Oklahoma City Thunder.

Why did they succumb to the 30 points poured in by superstar-in-waiting Kevin Durant and the athleticism of rising tyros Russell Westbrook and Jeff Green? It was the coaching schemes or dodgy rims. No, the Knicks players blamed the loss on the fact that their game preparation had been disturbed by staying in a haunted hotel.

There might even be a shred of merit to their claim. For years, guests at Oklahoma’s Skirvin Hilton have reported ghost sightings and strange noises. Legend has it that sometime in the 1930s, a woman jumped to her death while holding her baby in her hands.

It was all too much for 7ft, 300-pound center Eddy Curry. The seldom-used big man fled his 10th floor room in terror, seeking sanctuary in guard Nate Robinson’s quarters. Another Knicks player, Jared Jeffries, described the hotel as scary and said he definitely believed in the ghostly legend.

Odd excuses have been a staple of defending poor performances for many years. So much so, that the Sports Bloke decided to list his own particular favourites.

1996 – Manchester United’s grey shirt problem
Managers in the English Premier League are never shy when it comes to making excuses for poor showings by their teams. Inevitably, it’s never their fault. In his 23 years in charge at Old Trafford, Sir Alex Ferguson has become a past master of explaining away defeat. His most famous excuse came in 1996 when, trailing 3-0 at half-time to Southampton, Ferguson ordered his players to change from the grey strip  they had been wearing to an alternate blue kit. Ferguson later explained the grey kits had ruined his team’s passing game because they were having trouble seeing each other on the pitch. As bizarre as this sounds, statistics suggest Fergie may have had a point. United lost four of the five games they played wearing the grey kit before it was retired from use.

2001 – Tight slacks and shirts ruin Sri Lanka’s big day
When Sri Lanka lost the ICC Champions Trophy final to Pakistan they didn’t blame the defeat on their batting, bowling or fielding. No, their loss was due to their tight-fitting clothing. According to captain Sanath Jayasuria, their kit was too small and restricted their movement and mobility in the field. He described the team’s shirts as tight-fitting women’s blouses. The team’s tailor was subsequently instructed to make their kits one size larger but it was too late to avert defeat in the showpiece final.

2007 – Stephen Ireland’s “dead” grandmother
Manchester City midfielder Stephen Ireland pulled out of a crucial Euro 2008 qualifier for the Republic of Ireland after claiming his maternal grandmother had died. Unfortunately, the media discovered Ireland’s nan was alive and well. Ireland then changed his story, claiming it was in fact his paternal grandmother who had shaken off this mortal coil. It was then revealed that this nan was also very much alive. Eventually, Ireland came clean and admitted he simply missed his girlfriend and wanted to go home.

1992 – Lighton Ndefwayl goes on the offensive
Zambian tennis player Lighton Ndefwayl could have easily reacted to defeat in a local tournament in a mature, considered way. Luckily for this particular article, he singularly failed to do so. After falling to defeat against compatriot Musumba Bwayla, Ndefwayl described his opponent as a stupid man and a hopeless player who sported a big nose and cross-eyes. He added for good measure “Girls hate him. He beat me because my jock strap was too tight and because he farts when he serves. This made me lose my concentration, for which I am famous throughout Zambia”. ‘Nuff said!

2003 – Mervyn King and the air conditioning
Darts stars Mervyn “The King” King and Raymond “Barney” van Barneveld faced off in the semi-final of the 2003 BDO World Darts Championships. When Barney prevailed, King blamed the loss on the air conditioning in the areana. King said he has asked for it to be turned off once he had taken the stage. Surely the pumped-in breeze would affect both players ability to punish the 60 and hit their doubles. Not so, claimed King. He explained that “the air conditioning doesn’t affect Raymond because he throws a heavier dart and a very flat dart”. For the record, the tournament organisers confirmed that the air conditioning had been switched off for the entire match.

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